Can I Tell You a Secret?

I am a little afraid of my upcoming surgery, actually, more than a little.

My body has never been cut open.  I still have my tonsils and adenoids.  Other than a couple of sew-ups, I am in pristine condition.  If I were an antique, I'd be worth money.  The surgery will remove the affected area of my esophagus and then re-attach my stomach to what remains.  This procedure calls for a 10-14 day hospital recovery, and a time of home recovery as well.

My doctors all say I'll do well, and I probably will.  But no one wants to be invalid, even if it is only for 6-8 weeks.  I don't want to have cancer either and my desire to be cancer free wins out over my fear of surgery with its accompanying invalidism.

There once was a young pastor who had some fears about his ministry.  Paul, the Apostle, wrote these words to him.  "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."   How do I reconcile my own fear about this surgery with this scripture?

1.  Fearful concern cannot be avoided.  Everyone experiences it.  No one should ever beat themselves up over having fearful concern.  It is your reaction to the fear that matters.
2.  In spite of my fear can I still make wise decisions and do the right things?  If so, I am not bound up by what Paul calls a Spirit of Fear.
3.  In the middle of my fearful moments do I see Papa supporting me and walking with me?  Having the knowledge of "God with me" makes all the difference in the world.
4.  Am I able to lean on others?  For me to think I can live a self-sufficient life is idiocy.  My wife, my kids, my family, my church are all there for me and the surgery will be a time for me to rely on them.

I can have a fearful concern and still remain positive in my relationships with family, others, and God.  I can be positive about the outcome and look forward to many years of life, love, and ministry.  I can reach out and grab the hand of Jesus and absolutely know that he will be with me.  After all, he said, "And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”   


Yes, I have some fear, but I am not caught up in a Spirit of Fear.  Instead, I am caught up in heaven sent love.  Love that sheds light on what I am going through and puts my fear in perspective.  This sounds like another Street Light to me.