His comment raised my curiosity and I rushed home to check it out. I got home, went into the bathroom, and grabbed my rear view mirror to have a look at the aforementioned, once ample, section of anatomy. I discovered that while I do indeed have a bottom, it seems to have dropped out of sight.
Gravity has struck again.
A silly, but true, story to illustrate an important point. Many of us fighting cancer lose a lot of weight. I have been hovering at 195 lbs for a couple of months. I have not been at this weight since I was in my 20's. Before my diagnosis, I lost 40 lbs through proper diet and exercise. After chemotherapy and radiation began I lost more, and have continued to lose since the surgery. I have lost a total of 145 lbs so far, and may lose some more in the near future.
This is not bragging. It actually is troubling. Cancer eats away at the body. Chemotherapy and radiation make you too sick to eat. There often is a surgery that inhibits eating. Every time I look in a mirror I am reminded of the battle going on inside me. I am forced to consider my new reality and totally different self image.
These extreme body changes can do a number on the cancer patient's psyche. It is no wonder that despondency and depression are so common among Cancer Warriors. Cancer Warriors include patients, caregivers, family, and loved ones. If you are a Cancer Warrior and you feel depressed, despondent, blue, blah, or yucky, I want to encourage you to seek help. You need someone to walk beside you. Do not be ashamed to seek out a professional. You have moved out of the Present Moment into a place of shadowy maybe's. Another person's objective viewpoint will help you to regain a proper perspective.
If you are watching a friend lose weight to cancer, remember their body is also losing strength. Muscle mass is shrinking. Your kind offers of physical chores might be appreciated. Car washes, oil changes, gutter clean outs, etc might be just the thing to brighten someone's day and to express your love.
When you express your love and brighten someone's day you become a Street Light. Cancer Warriors need Street Lights. The Street Lights keep us straight. Thank you for caring.
********
Diagnosis: July 18, 2011
Staged: at 4a just a couple of days later
Chemo Port Installed: July 31, 2011
Began radiation and chemotherapy: early August 2011
Esophagus removed: Jan. 19, 2012
Surgery Approach: Large belly incision to allow access to gall bladder, lymph
nodes, esophageal junction with stomach, etc. Large back
incision to allow access to the upper esophagus and lymph
nodes through the ribs.
Hospital Stay: 10 days
Feeding tube removed: end of Feb/first of March
Life changes: Type 2 diabetes disappeared. Current weight <200 lbs. (This
is a HUGE loss for me.) Very little stomach remains. Small
meals and many meals. Dumping Syndrome remains. (Look
it up.) Weakness. Some depression. I have received love I
didn't know I had. God has emptied His blessing bucket on
me many times since diagnosis.
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